My baby girl

Wow last time I posted here it was before I had my baby girl so let me catch you up.

• Had a healthy baby girl
• I lost my job
• I still don't have a job
• I have loved being a stay at home mom
• I still have not lost all my pregnancy weight
• It is lonely sometimes
• I am natural now
• I still love my husband
• I am blessed, blessed, blessed.

Here is a picture of baby girl!

I know I haven't posted in a while

A while might be understating it. So let me catch you up. I am pregnant and my baby is due in less than a month. It has been a rough pregnancy. I broke my ankle in my 7th month. I gained a lot of weight. Cried about it. I cry about everything actually.  I have been off from work since. I am okay with that. I hate that fucking job and those insane people. I don't know what I am going to do after I have the baby. I won't have any FMLA time left. It sucks. The thought of putting my child in day care is so upsetting. I suppose they could fire me if I don't return. I would be okay with that, if I can get unemployment.

I am having a girl. I am ready for her to come out. I want my body back to myself. Pregnancy is not for me. I am not made for birthing babies.

That is about it.

Damn my posting here went down quite a bit

I guess Tumblr takes up more time. I don't write much because sometimes I feel like everything is stuck on negative. I am always complaining about something rather it be my job or my weight. I feel like I am just making it. What a waste of the precious time I have on this earth.

In July I will be married 5 years. Time flew by really. I really would like for us to take a trip. A proper honeymoon. We got married and carried on with our lives. I think our wedding for 15 minutes! We have been looking into St. Croix, Jamaica, Puerto Rico and Costa Rica. It's hard making a decision. I think we are leaning towards Jamaica because they have a lot of all-inclusive resorts. We are saving money so we will just have to see. We will need at least $3000 for the both of us to have a decent vacation.

Radiohead

Tomorrow!

Happy New Year!

Well, let me bulletpoint this shit because I can't be bothered.

• I still work at the University. I go back to work tomorrow. Ugh I don't want to, that place is so negative. As soon as I get an opportunity, I am transferring out that department. I love the school. I just don't like working in Admissions.
  
• Trying to lose weight again! Fuck, I just keep getting bigger and bigger. I feel if Janet can lose weight 10 times I should be able to do it once 1 good time.
• Still married, still in love with husband. My sex drive is in the toilet tho. I think it is due to the weight gain. I don't feel sexy or attractive. I just want to hide in this house. NOT good.
• For Christmas I got 6 pairs of pumps. I can't wait to wear them all to work!
• Currently reading the Hunger Games, it's pretty good.
• I am going to try and do the Insanity workout. That shit is brutal. Especially for my out of shape ass.
  
• What are you guys up too?
  

I forget to post over here

I swear y'all just need to get on tumblr but I just wanted to say the good news. I finally got a job!!!! After 6 damn months of looking and filling out application. I am back in higher education which is what I wanted. I start work Tuesday! I decided to get right into it. I have had 6 months of keeping vampire hours. Play time is over! I am so happy because I really wanted that job. They offered my job on my birthday! I was so depressed. The call was right on time!! That bitch Sallie Mae was breathing down my throat. What a relief I tell you. There are so many things we have been putting off due to me not having any funds!

How have you guys been?

Master Cleanse

I did that shit for 10 days. I have never fantasized about food like I did those 10 days. I don't know how in the hell people could it for 20 or 40 days. I lost ten pounds that I probably will gain back. I am trying to cut my calories I just need to do the working out part. I can not believe how chunky my black ass got. I suppose I have eating sadness. I feel like such a loser. I made a pact with my friend for us to lose 10 lbs by our bday June 28. I would feel so much better about myself. Shit maybe I should just go sit down somewhere and have some babies.

I'm so stressed

I have been looking for work since January. This year has just sucked but I hate to say that out loud as something worst might happen. I am starting to get student loan payment requests and it makes me break out in a sweat. I owe so much money! Between the loans I had left over from my associates and completing my bachelors. I need 2 damn jobs! I have only had about 4 sit down interviews and all were disappointing. I am trying not to get so sad about it.

I want to flee the country and never come back...

Fooling around with make up

Today I decided to do my video for my contest on youtube. I am giving away an apron I made. I requested a vintage look because the apron is kind of vintage in style. I need something to do with my time. Sunday I am shooting a girl in her prom dress. I charged her next to nothing. I really don't have confidence in my photography. I am not really a portrait or fashion photographer. So we will see.

Here is my beat face! The earrings I am wearing are made my Selima, check out her website
http://www.beautyonblast101.com/

I'm sewing now

Still no job...how long have I been looking now since I graduated in December? Yes, honey no one wants to hire my black ass. So I have been keeping myself busy. I started sewing again. I haven't sewn since high school. I don't even want to tell you how long ago that was. I am starting out slow. Sometimes the instructions on the patters are so confusing. I have been having to negro rig the waistbands on my aprons. Here is my first sewing project.

It's a vintage styled apron. I think it is cute. I am in the process of sewing another one for a give away on my youtube channel. I am still very much a beginner at this but it is fun and I like to create.